[[Roger Castillo]] [[Satsang]] [[notes]] [[2021-11-24]] seeking driven by a sense/feeling of uncomfortableness: guilt: wrong in the past of my action... embarrassment blame: towards other, mental story... outcome believed to be caused by other pride (guilt): personal doership pain interpreted as an attack to myself worry: invested in future outcome expectation attachment to outcome thought-based identity: it feel who I am. An image of myself contained in a thought structure inherent uncomfortableness conceptual-based, judgmental relative to "me" we might not even know what is happening who are you when story gets cut off? can be scary to glimpse that we are no-one can be unsettling to have psychological-self dissolves; existential fear. for others: moment of thinking-stop = relieve, revelation of essence beneath thinking just stop narrative suffering falls away in an instant, can stop any moment ... revealing thought-based sense of self/attitude . glimpse in practice: peace of mind is due to seeing again and again "this is not my true nature" working mind becomes familiar with guilt, worry, expectation as thinking assumed autonomous entities believe that outcomes make life okay that's why people are so involved in circumstances there is no perfect configuration deep realization that comfortableness is never to be found in circumstances, in the flow of of life your happiness is never to be found in circumstances if it never been pointed out, we might spend a whole life with suffering in the light of awareness suffering burns up not knowing ourself = knowing ourself incorrectly essence, consciousness doesn't think what we are is prior to thinking what we are is not the body, the body thinks old sense of self = i am the body that thinks/feels our being is complete, right now these descriptions simply remind, point; to weaken psychological self, to strengthen capacity to simply be. In the being it become self-evident that there is nothing to gain; I am complete; nothing is missing, no complains. the body understands fullness in gaining. being = feeling complete, nothing is missing continuous, unbroken feeling... diminishing of false identity gradual change crumbling rebuilds itself; progressive dissolving paradox 5:42 reality is the mix of the two, the sides of the same coin